When we’re in a romantic relationship, we’re often our most vulnerable selves. We open up to our partner, sharing our deepest fears, desires, and emotions. But sometimes, our partner might respond to our emotional expression with a phrase that can be incredibly invalidating: You’re too sensitive.

These four words can be incredibly damaging, implying that our emotions are somehow lesser or more fragile than others. It’s essential to know how to respond to this phrase in a way that validates our emotions while also communicating our needs effectively.

Here are some strategies and example sentences to help you handle these conversations:

Acknowledge their perspective

When your partner says You’re too sensitive, they might be trying to convey that they didn’t mean to hurt your feelings or that they think you’re overreacting. Acknowledge their perspective, and show that you’re willing to listen to their side of the story.

I understand that you didn’t mean to hurt my feelings, but when you said that, it really hurt me.

Clarify their intentions

Sometimes, our partner might not even realize the impact of their words. Ask them to clarify what they meant by their comment, and use this opportunity to educate them on how their words affected you.

Can you explain what you meant by saying I’m too sensitive? I want to understand where you’re coming from.

Express your emotions

When someone tells you you’re too sensitive, they might be implying that your emotions are invalid or overly dramatic. Take this opportunity to express how you’re feeling and why their comment affected you.

When you say I’m too sensitive, it makes me feel like you’re dismissing my emotions. I’m feeling really hurt right now because I feel like you’re not taking my feelings seriously.

Set boundaries

If your partner consistently tells you you’re too sensitive, it might be a sign of a deeper issue in the relationship. Communicate your boundaries clearly, and let them know that you won’t tolerate emotional dismissal.

I understand that we might have differences in opinion, but I need you to respect my emotions and validate my feelings. Saying I’m too sensitive is not okay, and I’d appreciate it if you could be more empathetic.

Seek understanding

Conversations are a two-way street. When your partner says You’re too sensitive, try to understand where they’re coming from and what they’re trying to achieve with their comment. Ask open-ended questions to facilitate a deeper conversation.

What do you think I’m being too sensitive about? Help me understand why you said that.

Practice active listening

Active listening is essential in any conversation, especially when emotions are running high. Show your partner that you’re engaged in the conversation and value their perspective.

Just to make sure I understand, you’re saying that I’m being too sensitive about X because of Y. Is that right?

Reframe the conversation

Sometimes, it’s essential to reframe the conversation to focus on the issue at hand rather than your emotional response. Redirect the conversation to the original topic, and try to find a resolution.

Let’s take a step back and focus on the issue we were discussing. How can we find a solution to this problem together?

Remember, effective communication is key to any successful relationship. By acknowledging your partner’s perspective, clarifying their intentions, expressing your emotions, setting boundaries, seeking understanding, practicing active listening, and reframing the conversation, you can navigate these complex conversations with ease.

As you continue to grow and communicate with your partner, keep in mind that emotional intelligence is a muscle that can be developed over time. By practicing empathy, active listening, and open communication, you can build a stronger, more loving relationship that honors both partners’ emotions.

In the words of the poet Rupi Kaur, the wound is the place where the light enters you. By embracing our vulnerabilities and communicating effectively, we can turn even the most painful conversations into opportunities for growth and deeper connection.

Be kind ❤