How to respond to “I’ve been hurt by someone I trusted before”

When someone shares with you that they’ve been hurt by someone they trusted, it’s essential to respond in a way that shows empathy, understanding, and support. Your response can make all the difference in helping them feel heard, validated, and comforted. Here are some strategies and example sentences to help you respond effectively:

Acknowledge their pain

When someone opens up about their past hurt, it’s crucial to acknowledge their pain and let them know that you’re listening. This helps them feel heard and validated, which can be incredibly empowering.

I’m so sorry to hear that. That must have been really tough for you.

That sounds incredibly painful. I can only imagine how hard that must have been for you.

I can sense how much that hurt you. Thank you for trusting me with that.

Show empathy and understanding

Empathy is key in situations like this. Put yourself in their shoes and try to understand what they might have gone through.

I can only imagine how betrayed you must have felt when that happened.

That must have made you question everything. I’m here for you, and I care.

I’m trying to put myself in your shoes, and I can see why you’d feel that way.

Validate their emotions

It’s essential to validate their emotions and let them know that their feelings are normal.

It’s completely understandable that you’d feel that way after what you went through.

I think anyone in your situation would have felt the same way.

Your feelings are totally justified. Who wouldn’t feel that way after being hurt like that?

Offer support and reassurance

Let them know that you’re there to support them and that they’re not alone.

I’m here for you, and I want you to know that I’m not going anywhere.

You’re not alone in this. I’m here to support you every step of the way.

You can count on me to be here for you, no matter what.

Avoid giving unsolicited advice

While it’s natural to want to offer solutions, giving unsolicited advice can come across as insensitive or dismissive.

(Avoid saying things like: Just get over it, Move on, or Forget about it.)

Don’t make it about yourself

While it’s okay to share your own experiences, be careful not to make the conversation about yourself.

(Avoid saying things like: Oh, I went through something similar, let me tell you what I did…)

Listen actively

Active listening is crucial in situations like this. Make eye contact, nod to show you’re engaged, and ask open-ended questions to encourage them to share more.

What was going through your mind when that happened?

How did you manage to get through that difficult time?

What did you do to take care of yourself after that experience?

In conclusion, responding to someone who’s been hurt by someone they trusted requires empathy, understanding, and support. By acknowledging their pain, showing empathy, validating their emotions, offering support, and listening actively, you can help them feel heard, validated, and comforted. Remember to avoid giving unsolicited advice, making it about yourself, and focus on being present for the person who’s sharing their vulnerable story with you.

Be kind ❤

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