When someone says It was meant to be in response to an unfortunate event or situation, it can be frustrating, dismissive, and unhelpful. This phrase can come across as insensitive, implying that the universe had a plan and that there’s nothing we can do to change the outcome. It may make you feel like your feelings are being dismissed, and that the other person is not taking the time to understand your perspective.
In situations like this, it’s essential to respond in a way that acknowledges their comment while also expressing your own feelings and needs. Here are some strategies to help you handle conversations effectively:
Acknowledge their perspective
When someone says It was meant to be, you can respond by acknowledging their perspective while also expressing your own feelings. For example:
I understand where you’re coming from, but I’m still feeling really upset about this. Can we talk about how I can move forward from here?
Express your feelings
It’s essential to express your feelings and concerns in a clear and respectful manner. This can help the other person understand where you’re coming from and provide empathy. For example:
I know you’re trying to make me feel better, but honestly, it feels like you’re minimizing my feelings. Can we focus on finding a solution together?
Seek clarification
If someone says It was meant to be, you can ask them to clarify what they mean by that. This can help you understand their perspective and address any misconceptions. For example:
What do you mean by ‘it was meant to be‘? Are you saying that there was nothing we could’ve done to prevent this outcome?
Focus on the present
Instead of dwelling on the past or getting bogged down in philosophical debates, focus on the present moment and what you can do to move forward. For example:
I appreciate your perspective, but right now, I need help figuring out my next steps. Can we brainstorm some ideas together?
Set boundaries
If someone’s comment is not helpful or supportive, it’s okay to set boundaries and politely tell them that you’re not in a place to discuss it. For example:
I appreciate your concern, but I’m not really up for discussing this right now. Can we talk about something else?
Offer alternative perspectives
If you have a different perspective or insight, share it in a non-confrontational way. This can help the other person see things from a new angle and foster a more productive conversation. For example:
I understand where you’re coming from, but I think there might be other factors at play here. Let me share my thoughts, and we can discuss it further.
Here are more example sentences you can use to respond to someone who says It was meant to be:
I’m still trying to process what happened. Can we talk about how I can learn from this experience?
I appreciate your optimism, but I’m not ready to accept that it was meant to be. Can we focus on finding a solution?
That might be true, but it doesn’t change how I’m feeling right now. Can we talk about how I can move forward?
I understand what you’re saying, but it feels like you’re dismissing my feelings. Can we find a way to acknowledge both perspectives?
I’m not sure I agree, but I’m willing to consider alternative perspectives. Can you help me understand your point of view?
I appreciate your attempt to make me feel better, but it’s not helping right now. Can we try a different approach?
I’m still trying to make sense of what happened. Can we talk about what we can do differently next time?
I’m not sure I believe that everything happens for a reason. Can we discuss the role of chance and circumstance?
That might be your perspective, but it’s not comforting to me right now. Can we focus on finding ways to support each other?
I’m not sure I’m ready to accept that it was meant to be. Can we explore other possibilities?
I appreciate your input, but I need some time to process my feelings. Can we talk about this later?
I’m not sure that’s a helpful way to look at it. Can we talk about what we can do to prevent similar situations in the future?
Remember, effective communication is key to navigating conversations like this. By acknowledging the other person’s perspective, expressing your feelings, seeking clarification, focusing on the present, setting boundaries, and offering alternative perspectives, you can turn an unhelpful comment into a constructive conversation.
In the end, it’s essential to prioritize your own emotional well-being and take care of yourself in these situations. By doing so, you’ll be better equipped to handle conversations that might be challenging or unhelpful, and cultivate more meaningful relationships as a result.
Be kind ❤