What to say when your friend is dating someone who’s still in love with their ex

Handling conversations with friends can be tricky, especially when it comes to sensitive topics like relationships. One of the most delicate situations is when your friend starts dating someone who’s still hung up on their ex. As a supportive and caring friend, you want to offer guidance and encouragement without being too pushy or judgmental. Here are some strategies and example sentences to help you navigate these conversations effectively.

Listen and Acknowledge

Before offering any advice, it’s essential to listen to your friend’s concerns and acknowledge their feelings. Show empathy and let them know you’re there to support them.

Hey, I can imagine how tough this situation must be for you. I’m here to listen and help in any way I can.

That sounds really tough. How are you feeling about it?

Avoid Judgment and Blame

Refrain from criticizing your friend’s partner or making them feel guilty for staying in the relationship. Instead, focus on your friend’s feelings and well-being.

I can understand why you’re attracted to them, but I’m worried about how this might affect you.

Let’s focus on what you need and want from this relationship. What are your deal-breakers?

Encourage Honesty and Communication

Support your friend in having open and honest conversations with their partner about their feelings and expectations.

Have you talked to your partner about how you feel? Maybe it’s time to have an honest conversation about where they stand.

What do you want to happen in this relationship? What are your expectations?

Explore Red Flags and Concerns

Gently point out potential red flags, such as signs of lingering feelings for the ex or inconsistent behavior.

I’ve noticed they still have photos with their ex on social media. Has that been discussed?

How do you feel about the fact that they still text their ex regularly?

Encourage Self-Reflection

Help your friend evaluate their own feelings, needs, and boundaries in the relationship.

How do you think this relationship is affecting your self-worth and confidence?

What are your non-negotiables in a relationship? Are they being respected?

Offer Alternative Perspectives

Share your own observations and insights, but be careful not to impose your opinions.

From where I stand, it seems like their feelings for their ex are still pretty strong. Am I wrong?

Have you considered the possibility that they might need more time to heal from their past relationship?

Remind Them of Their Worth

Above all, remind your friend of their worth, deservingness of love, and the importance of prioritizing their own emotional well-being.

You deserve someone who is 100% invested in you and your relationship. Don’t settle for anything less.

Remember, you’re worthy of love, care, and respect. Don’t compromise on your values and boundaries.

In conclusion, handling conversations with your friend about their partner’s lingering feelings for their ex requires empathy, active listening, and a non-judgmental attitude. By using these strategies and example sentences, you can provide guidance and support while respecting your friend’s autonomy and decision-making. Remember, your role as a friend is to empower and uplift, not to dictate or control.

Be kind ❤

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